$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
