So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
the liver wants what the liver wants
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize