I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
