help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
