I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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