Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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