We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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