I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
