tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
