Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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