oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
