I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
