Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Let's get the cat blown out
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
