Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
did i just pee glitter
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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