Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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