I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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