I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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