Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize