is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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