love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
