bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She's not a foreskin expert like you
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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