I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
