i barfeds in our rink
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
