We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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