Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
