so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize