I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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