hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize