Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize