Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
