Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize