its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
