i barfeds in our rink
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
