Little spoons don't ask big questions
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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