pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
