and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize