It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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