...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
