oh fat girl friday strikes again...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
