How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
