Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
