He felt like a one man threesome
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
