i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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