Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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