soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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