Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
