Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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