Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Randomize