yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize