Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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